A few days ago, I began to think about my daughter starting Kindergarten soon. Tomorrow, in fact. I’m concerned that because we’ve kept such a tight reign on her social life (meaning who she’s allowed to hang out with) that she will come home with either an attitude we can’t stand, or saying things we don’t like. So, I came up with this little list of lessons that I’d like her to remember when she’s out and about and into her adulthood. I also think that these would apply to anyone, adult and child alike.
1) Never say or do anything to hurt another person’s feelings on purpose; always tell the truth from your heart and not with mean-spiritedness. Don’t call people names, steal their toys, or talk about them in a mean way. If your friend asks you if that dress makes her butt look big and it does, find a nice way to tell her that maybe she isn’t accenting her best attributes.
2) Having an opinion does not give you the right to share it with everyone. You don’t need to opine about every single thing you read, hear, or see. If your friend decides to wear the dress that makes her butt look big and you’ve tried to help her but she didn’t listen, you do not have to say “I told you so”, or tell her every time she wears that dress that her butt looks big. See Rule Number One.
3) Trust God that He knows what you need in life. This is self-explanatory.
4) Recognize that there are people out there who will break some of these rules and forgive them for it. Not everyone has been raised to be positive. Some people only see the negative in life. Forgive them, but pray that they see the Light.
5) Always know that your Mom and Dad will be there for you. We will always be your rocks. We will always be available for a chat. BUT, we will not coddle you and let you sponge off of us forever. We are here to teach you to be independent.
6) Never point at anyone. It is just impolite. Unless you’re in a police room where you’re viewing a line-up behind one way glass. Then it’s probably ok. But let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.
7) Don’t pick your nose in public. Again, this goes back to not telling everyone what’s going on in your brain. We don’t need to know what’s going on in your nose, either.
8 ) If your friend has told you a secret, and it won’t hurt her or anyone else, you must keep the secret! Trust is a major quality in a relationship. If your friend can’t trust you, you aren’t friends. This goes both ways. This is only true if the secret isn’t going to harm anyone. Clearly, if the secret can bring harm to anyone, YOU MUST TELL YOUR MOTHER OR FATHER.
9) Please dress appropriately. Your rear-end is not a billboard (so don’t advertise “Juicy” on it), nor should it be peaking out from under shorts or skirts. Keep it covered. This goes for your chest as well. Unless you’re at the beach or pool, then it’s ok to wear your bikini with shorts.
10) You may not be a supermodel, but you’re beautiful. You have talents that you may not even realize. They’re there. Trust me. Find and use them. God has given us all something that makes us unique. Be beautiful in what you do and who you are. Beauty isn’t skin deep. My grandma always said, “Pretty is as pretty does”.
11) If you can find the thing you love to do in life and make a living at it, then do it. You should be happy in your job.
12) Find the person who loves you for who you are. You don’t have to have someone “complete” you. You are a complete person without having a man or woman make you “whole”. If they compliment your personality and you can get along with them and love them for who they are, you’re half way there.
13) Help those less fortunate than you. But don’t be a push-over. Don’t let anyone take advantage of you. But help the poor, the homeless and hungry. Help the elderly lady carry her groceries to her car. Help your family and friends when you can.
14) Be modest in all of your abilities and qualities. But be confident in who and what you are. This is a fine line one must walk without crossing into the self-centeredness area. No one wants to be friends with someone who is self-centered and egotistical. But confidence is a great quality. Knowing that you can do and be anything you want to be is great knowledge to have.
15) Be a good friend. Be loyal, stand beside your friends when they need you, listen to them, laugh with them, love them like family. They will do the same for you.
16) Stand up for your brother (and others who can’t stand up for themselves). Be a good Big Little Sister to him. He loves you and you are his best friend. This does not mean that you must do everything for him. He is not your responsibility, but we do have a responsibility to him. As his family members, it is our responsibility to watch out for him and do what’s best for him.
17) And above all else, love God. He is your maker, He is Love. If you love God, you’ll love your fellow man and yourself. You’ll see people as He sees them. Perfectly imperfect.
18) What I’ve seen with these rules/lessons is that they all come back to “Just be kind, and love the Lord.” If we all would follow these two rules, how different our world could be.
So, these are the rules/life lessons I’ve come up with in the past few days. I realize that not all of these apply to my daughter at this age, but I’d like to think her father and I will impart these lessons and more as she grows. Hopefully, she’ll be modest but confident, loving but not a push-over, and helpful without being a martyr. Here’s to hoping we can raise her right!
What are the lessons/rules in your home?